Pennies for the dream, buy your way to heaven.

It's just a ploy.
A movie.
Maybe they are devouring your fears and feeding off your stressful worries...
It's all pretending in an effort to keep your eyes away from what they are doing.
Even considering 'them' a 'they' and separate and against you is a tactic...
It's NOT REAL.
Like a magician...there's the more important real things happening...
and you keep blubbering on about the story they've fed you....

Humpty Dumpty IS TWO people...
and they can't see anything if they aren't on their higher perspective (the wall)
Instead they are on the ground, seeing the barriers, arguing whether or not the other is the truth or not...
Humpty's side is his truth.... and he fights against the other side...
Dumpty's side is his truth.... and he fights against the other side...
They both yell at the wall... oh that blasted wall that isn't giving us the full picture....
BUT the wall is what you can climb to get a higher picture....
A better view of the whole, instead of just one side...

This is relevant for just about every situation where one side is against the other.
It is the burden of duality.
And I'm not sure who tf told you not to climb the wall...
BUT FUCKING CLIMB.
Out of your pit of blindness.
Out of the pit of for or against.
Out of the pit of force, struggle, enemies, choices...all that horseshit...
WE GET TO HAVE IT ALL.
And then we can take what we like best...
There's no lack, there's no limits..and there's certainly no force.
STOP playing into the fears that there will be, or could be...
You have authority.
And you playing 'what if' stories in your head all day is only another fucking wall.
OWN YOUR SOVEREIGNTY NOW
Right fucking now. You don't have to figure out what you're gonna do
You're going to be fucking sovereign.
And there's no room for anything less.
Stop trying to make room for it.

'They' can't touch you when you're above them.

You are the valuable one.
You are the prize.
Treasure yourself.

Financial Feng Shui 101

Back door keys.
We all know that there's a door out front. The obvious. The displays pointing out what it's all about...
or more likely what they want you to believe it's all about...
You know...get a job, work hard, save!
Do all these things in these steps...and wha la, you've made it. You prosper and thrive...

But ya know the truth by now...don't you?
That works for a time, and sometimes we get promotions and actually can live a lifestyle of at least some sense of comfort...some sense of security....or what I like to call 'fucking boring'.
And if only we had more time in the day, we could do even more and make more of that cold hard cash.
If we only had a better job, or worked harder, or had more focus to actually care about the things we are pretending to care about...like that office party, or the overtime bonus, or maybe getting free tacos next Tuesday...

If you aren't happy playing pretend in a world full of frontdoorsmen...then I just want to share that there are other doors to the world of money, to income, to cash, to living so sweet that you can't even remember how much crypto you actually bought last year, just because you could...

There are side doors... these get used often by those with connections. Those who have supportive family and friends that know a guy or two.
In my life, this was a pipe dream...no one's going to open doors for anyone, or for what it's worth....they don't know anyone except maybe the pot dealers and the guy who will take care of a mthrfckr if anyone ever hurts you.

There are cargo doors... the ones that bring in the people who work for the system of money and finance....and kinda know the ins and outs a little bit better than the rest of us. This gives them a slight heads up and an advantage to make moves that put them in positions of making a good and prosperous investment.
I may have slipped through these doors a few times, but I'm not so into it enough to believe anything they say as my truth. There's a lot of learning to be done through this doorway...as well as discernment and a huge dose of unlearning afterwards. For me, that's too much hard work.

We won't discuss the basement and rooftop entrances...but use your imagination...the crazies and stealthy assassin fuckers use those...and they are great, but you don't want to run into another crazie or an assassin. Just a heads up. Dangerous, both of them. They will cut you.

We are here to throw some tidbits out about the other door.... The backdoor.
And once inside you can cut your own key so you can return anytime you want. They have a machine right there too, and it's free....so hey... it's like being treated like the elite and you don't have to wait in line out front or be corralled into your tiny rows of compliance.

The backdoor is about stepping into the arena of money with a bag. And while you're in there, you browse around until you find something pleasing and stick it in your bag to take home. You can stay as long as you want, leave when you want, and return when you want.
It's not about 'doing' (that's the frontdoorsmen), not about the analyzing (cargodoors), and not a carry you to victory (sidedoors). It's about playing long enough to get your fill and then going home to bask in the glory of your stash of cash.

Examples of backdoor prosperity:
Checks coming in the mail from things you totally forgot about, or were expecting...but just because you are open to receiving.
Having a blast creating something just because and then someone buying it just because.
Wanting to try something challenging and get paid while you are learning.
Making comments about how great it is that cash falls in your lap...and then out of pure ironic spite, the Universe drops it in your lap.
Aligning energy through meditation, clearing, and having real fun...and getting paid to do it. Through others, through rendevous', through all sorts of channels.
Being completely okay to let go of all the tasks and hard work stuffs and trying....and creating more money when you do.

It's all about the being and allowing and openness of receiving... that creates the momentum for the support to reach you.
99% of everyone who's tried going through the backdoor give up before the energy has time to manifest onto this reality plane.
It's not like getting paid on a Friday. It's about getting paid with a never-ending stream...but you got to stay in the stream. Don't bail out because Friday is here and there's no money in your pocket.
This is real sustainable energy, not the quick fix you get addicted to.
The smoother you transition into the stream when you want to play the money game, the quicker it comes. The more you practice, the more it flows. The more you create a space of energetic energy within you and throughout your life flow.....the higher and more abundant that support will attract to you. Sometimes instantaneously.

I don't always play the game of money and enter the arena, but when I do, it's always a guarantee. And I don't work a lick.  (I admit I tell a lot of people that I'm working, or headed to work....but I'm actually 100% going out to the pool, or going to paint something, or I'm writing content like this)....which is my 'work'...but it's not work work -like hard things I don't really want to do.
My only prerequisite to do anything is that I want to and I think I will enjoy it, or it gives me a challenge. Or I want to learn more about it. Or whatever....
I do what I want....and I want to write. I want to go swimming and bask in the sun. I want to paint or do a home improvement project at the worst of times. I want to go to the casino, or get a smoothie... All of that is my work. Amazing work.

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Always feel free to slide into my messages if you want more details, brainstorm some ideas, or whatever. I'm not selling coaching calls or trying to get sign ups for jack.
I'm a beast at making money with just doing energy work, and only doing what I enjoy.
I want that for those who want that too. <3



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There's a kitten highly interested in the cursor on the screen...
This might get deleted if she fails to have impulse control....she's still learning that...
and frankly doing her best, even if it doesn't seem that way.
She's a learning cat. Really smart. But she's like 12 weeks old...sooo.
Its a roll of the dice, and the dice are weighted... iykwim

One of the quail escaped the bus to freezer camp, and now is hanging out out back on the outside of the coop. We haven't been able to catch him yet.
Seriously just going to put him inside the coop...as the bus to freezer camp has already left.
He doesn't know that though.
So now there's food and water out there for him too.
Dumb bird.

Here's the mundane...
Sewing work...stuff done, stuff in works, and stuff in line next.
I did sell some art along with all that too, so high five!
Pool is going through it's issue with rain/humidity...and $60 went into it today.
idk...stuff is just normal.
I ordered some irises months ago and they will arrive tomorrow...
which means I need to dig up the ones I already have.
They all go to the back...somewhere...
Garden is struggling... I should probably water it.
Isaac went to doggie heaven two weeks ago. He had like a dog stroke or something...
He's a good boy.

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oh no! it' like 3 days later, cause that's how we roll!!!!!!!!
hahahahaha!!!

ooh...wait, the sun is out...
I gotta go to work, yo!
later gaters///

None of this is real

I did that thing again...
Where the Alchemist slides a contract my way and hands me a pen.
And when I sign it, I also draw a little happy face next to my signature.

"You didn't even read it all." He sighs.
I smile at him and shrug. I am ready for the upgrade, otherwise I wouldn't have been offered the new contract.

He pulls the form away and glances at my signature, with the little face next to it.

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?" He smirks at the childish drawing.

Well...I guess he has now.

He seems in a much lighter happier mood than his usual egoic stoicism.
Gentler. More patient. More relaxed.
I merely just wonder if I'll lose this connection with him.
He's been with me for over 2 years. I've grown immensely fond of him.
I'm not worried though. He is easy to find.

One thing about signing ethereal contracts....
you really don't know what it entails, it's a 'jump and you'll find out' kind of thing. Every time
But I can fly now...

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If that wasn't enough.... I also overlapped my whole history and past with a replacement.
....this morning....
This is beyond the 'past hacking' that was satisfying before.... where you just alter and shift around things...
This was like recording over a recording... there's still the original imprint...but now you've written over it to where most of it is completely the new, versus the original. It still buffering, as it's only been a few hours... but... I can already feel the differences...
I'm not even the least bit afraid of erasing any of it. It was merely a bad recording of the same song...
but the new one is made in a studio, with someone who can sing worth a damn...and has a record contract... HAHAHAHA! Get it... a 'record' contract.
I fucking love my life.

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I have writing homework.
Because I buy courses on a whim to hone my perceptions of whether I'm crazy or not.
I'm knowingly still more chaotic than not. For the win.

I get to write a bio...
but a creative upscale bio...

If only I believed in bio's... this might be more aligned.... *sigh

"  Jennifer Coots is a multi-million idealist with more than enough aspiring adventures to cause a sufficient tsunami in the Atlas Mountains. If the six discrete fantasy novels she wrote wasn't enough, you'd still be left with the paintings of numerous oddities and fabric arts that seem to arrange themselves into cute children's clothing from time to time. Not to mention the photography whenever she's really tired of thinking about how she should do more photography and just does it out of spite, but is always happy she did.
  What was that about painting furniture? Oh yeah, a rescuer at heart, she saves abandoned and abused wooden anomalies on the side of the road and brings them home for rehab and refreshments. We won't mention the arrangement of plants and animals that genuinely co-habitate with her because she's a sucker and falls prey to their beck and call...all the damn time. She loves to arrange home remodels sometimes in the middle of four other projects. Cause chaos and fun are best friends and like to start shit while the momentum is HOT!
  A master manifestor...manifester?..with ever-so-satisfying connections to the ethereal realms, she is hyper otherworldy and often found grounding in the pool, meditating, writing...oh shit, did I even mention she's a damn fantastic writer! or sometimes vegs out on Farm Heros Saga (level 2350 someodd, yo!) and Tik Tok, because how else are we supposed to get the 'closer to real' news.
  A real keeper. There's a Twin Flame husband, a Fire Sign daughter, and a Guru Master son involved too. A healthy ego when it comes to Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy and almost everything else that doesn't involve history or literature. She also doesn't follow rules, so don't expect anything to go as planned or in all relevance, good, legal, normal, or taking sides with love and light all the time, cause that shit gets old fast. Will ghost you if you start acting or talking stupid, because explanations are for people who care about soothing other's confusion. This girl will ditch your ass and never think of you again.
  Blunt advice, real talk, deep talk enough to drown you within the first 14 minutes after she gives you sufficient time to bail. No mercy, probably a bit hard core, and no tolerance for the weak or fear trodden. Loves conspiracy theories, but not that much. Loves alien talk, but not that much...unless it involves those black triangle ufos, cause she's seen that shit up close. Enjoys a good frolic into the psyche, into the aether, or into the eternal throes of Source and fake moon jargon.
  Has a soft spot for superheros, villains, and kittens. Pisces sun, Scorpio moon and ascendant. And that's far more than needed already. Good luck! :)  "


That does sound so like me.... hmm... I should be a writer...

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"I like to mix tequila and rum into all that love and light shit."
Another one of my grand quotes I'm willing to post all over social media...

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So it's days later....
...
I thought I'd just come to post all this...but meh... not feeling in... hoping something good will fall from these fingertips...




I have another writing lesson, which I'm not going to do....
huzzah

There's so much overwhelm drifting in the world. This and that and these things and those things and all that stuff over there. ...
Do we even know that we don't have to pick any of it up...
do we even know...

The Alchemist walks with me. He's silent, a bit overly focused forward...
but he's more tuned in to my vibration right now... it's kinda weird....new.
like he's putting me through one of those virus scans, haha...
I don't want to interrupt him and his...work..

It's weird...like I already know what the next step is... which is also new...
I'm usually left hanging until I'm thrown into it...
but now I know exactly what's next...
and maybe I'm waiting for him to tell me, for confirmation or something...
but even that... I know he won't now...
we are in new territory....and things have been reworked and new worlds have awaken...
I say this like I didn't just write it a few days ago up above...
it feels like forever...
a whole lifetime even....holy shit...

This step is the reboot...even as we go through it now, and now...
a rewriting? a something...
things are soooo weird... and so fucking cool!
and this step is also the awakening after this reboot...
and what will the world be then?
how fucking beautiful.... <3

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I keep seeing so many others in their corrals. Not even aware that they are corrals...
many still fighting against other's barriers all while ignoring their own.
and also knowing that all the barriers aren't even real or there in the first place!
This whole elaborate experiment is so fucking amazing....and people are just thinking up their corrals and their paths and their enemies and theirselves... wow!
even still others fighting against the ones in charge..
is there even anyone in charge? I haven't found proof of this... these gamemasters....
Even me.... I watch this game... seeing all the pieces...not even knowing what the end point is or why...
and the gamemasters are hidden from me as well...
at this point, I can't say they are bad, or aliens, or good, or humans...or aliens...
and all possible theories out there are not coherant to what's happening...
and I'm really bummed that new ideas haven't reached the players ears... like come on already...
wake up!
I wonder how much I paid to watch this movie?
Or maybe I own the theater...and this production is happening on stage....as I watch from my pristine viewing point... and I can't remember the director's name, lol. Enjoying the show, nonetheless.
I love all of this.
The player, the actors...the extras too... the props, the backdrops...
None of this is real.....yet they all believe it is.... and I am astounded and exhilarated to discover what's next in this story.


I'm guessing this is enough...and will be back to write when I fill up with some momentum and inspiration to write something.


Hubble bunnies drift through the stars while eating their chocolate discs of peppermint dipped in shadows. Try not to crash into the moon, we're using it for a watching station and it echoes really loud when you try to shoot things at us.... thanks.

 

Covering all the bases... and then some

Niche
noun: a comfortable or suitable position in life or employment.
A recess, a crevice, a little hole for you to crawl in and make your nest...
This nice cozy place called: this is where you belong....so stay there...

Let's not, yo.
Let's not shrink yourself into this little piss water hole.
Not a niche, not a focus, not an all in to this tiny glorious hole...

Let's be water.
A flood.... the tsunami.... the tidal wave...
The one that scatters it's force in all the niches...
That fills many holes. That carves out deeper and deeper trenches and rivers.
The one that not only fills the gaps... but drowns out the filth...

Be so fucking awesome...there's no room left for anything else.

"Be water, my friend"...a simple Bruce Lee phrase
Crash, drown, move, flow, and at times rest....
but never just stay in one place.

We are all meant to transform.
And to transform the world around us.

We get to choose all the things that bring us joy.
We get to choose all the things that are a part of us.
We get to be, do, have everyfuckingthing we want.





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There is a baby mouse in my garage.
He got cat captured and still kicking...
I've named him Zackary.
He's kinda sorta taking kitten formula, so there's hope.

I also have the group of 15 (is it 15?) 3 week old quail in the coop, but separate from the adults.
And 22, 2 day old quail chicks in the brooder.
These will be the last batch for a year or so.
Some get added to the flock, some go to freezer camp.
Either way, my egg supply is at it's best game

Why do they give Roman Reigns so much shit?
He's my fav, and I don't even watch wrestling.

I have so many things in the works, it's kinda fun.
Some ShadowDragon Dreams line up for late August...
will most likely have to hit up Hobby Lobby and Joann's..
as shipping and fabric costs online are stupid crazy...

Branding work for fb...
honing down the whole writing gig thing..
I'll eventually add in some art, when it decides to show up...
met some really interesting, fun, cool people....
only a handful or two get unfriended or blocked....but it's worth it to find the good ones.

There's a writing course I bought...starts tomorrow, but I haven't gotten the email yet...
So *shrugs... last minute thing I guess...

I'm exceedingly tired....so probably gonna cut everything short.
Need to feed Zackary once more, refresh the baby chicks water...
meditate, reiki, and sleeeeeeepppp
zzzZZZzzzZZZzzz

I will avoid tik tok for tonight, only out of recognition that I like meditating better.

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Happy 4 whole days of whatevers

 Soooo.... water was making sounds today...
and a friend of mine suggested I got a hearing upgrade...
cause just a few days ago, I had a 'thump thump thump' on my ear...
like a fairy kicking it.... on the outside, but nothing was there...and I don't even think I felt it physically.

and today I heard water...
not the sound it makes as it hits things...
it's sound....it's frequency as is flows....
at first I let it go by as these hoses (both front and back yard) are weird today...okay
sciency pressure, right...
but them inside in the sink as it was dripping, it was like some old analog computer dings and dongs...
like aol dialup (does this age me?)... like morse code... like tones....
it was weird....
I asked the kitten why the water was making that sound...
but she didn't answer me...

Imma have to take a shower tonight and see what it says, LOL




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The Alchemist wasn't kidding about the falling away and not holding hands thing...
it's not even gone yet, but I see it inching towards the edge.
I'm kinda excited to see it falter and trip, cascading down the mountain
I like the destruction. The chaos. The momentum of change.
I like the falling away of old things... it leaves such open spaces
broad skies, leveled ground, ...possibilities

Maybe I see too far ahead, always seeing the greatness...
while the world always seems to look at the what is-ness...things in the way today...
crying cause they are falling apart and dying, or crumbling...
um...yeah.... can't you see how amazing it's gonna be!
Meh...

"The greater the chaos, the greater the joy."
something I actually wrote many years ago when I tried my hand at making memes....
I should do that again, but with mini art...
it's much easier to talk myself out of writing content...than it is to post art...
and art with words.... it makes for a great combo of having content....and art...
it's always fun to share art...
but content, especially my content, is rather abrupt and filled with a sense of ...please jump off the damn cliff and kill yourself.....so you can 'really' know the truth of who you are....
and people are often afraid of the death stuff...
meh.... pussies

no shame bitches...I'm kinda burnt out on being passive
not that I want to engage with anyone....but blah...
we can be all the things....and that be a good thing...

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speaking of...

I spoke to Thoth again last night....
learned a whole hell of a huge revelation about resonance.

WE ARE THE RESONANCE CHAMBER!

this has to do with choosing, focus to feed energy to that choice/vision...
and resonating with it to 'tune' it into a feel good vibration...
and then open to receive the match to it.... (by letting go of resistance or blocking it)
In other words, expert level manifestation.

It's been less than a day....
I will certainly update you on this new technique.

this goes hand in hand with that dream I had about the resonance chamber and the tones coming from the center pipe totem thing.... and it echoes/reverberates back off the circular walls to create coherence within the body/position...and creates/heals/tunes/etc, all of reality.

Anyway...really cool shit happening!


Here's a pic with colors!!!


Colors are my fav.


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I'll be back later, maybe post this eventually....


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Day 2, cause that's how I roll


"Something to be passionate about. An 'extra' $3k."

look at this shit... the shit I write when asked what I'm 'calling in for July'.
We know the answer to passion, isn't to be passionate about a thing or action...
it's being passionate about you....yourself...your whole being

if that was the case, that $3k would be some low ball offer for something priceless
...we know that number is crumbs for the peasants who wallow in the sty
some poor people mindset of paying off a debt...one I don't even pay interest on anyway...
fuck that...

I am beyond this shit that trickles out of the bottom of the vessel...
time to establish a kingdom
and it will be me

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argh...  Day 3
nothing bad...as all my days are practically fantastic
and I feel a release of some heavy weight lifting off...
maybe it is the planets or some shit like that

I wrote a post for my coaching page yesterday and later around 2 am, deleted it...
meh.... how can we be the same person all the time?? what fun is that really?
I call you a motherfucker...but the definition is not what you think...
or yo, bitches....but even that comes misunderstood or too bluntly...
yeah, I may want to shove your ass off a cliff because you're fucking stupid...
but not unless you asked me to... I have a low lying level of morality somewhere, geesh

meh... fuck you all
another falling away thing...
cause Imma just do what I want...
and I quit one of those jobs I got already...
HAHA! Bitches! Hows that for testing the waters like fucking BOSS!
   (what made me jump ship, you ask? the moment it said the job was only relevant for Whole Foods, or Whole Foods East for Prime deliveries...yeah well, Whole Foods was great until they became a bunch of left wing fucking pussies.) I said what I said.

Watched 'Infinite' last night. ummm.... the premise was okay, but I give it a pass. Low enough budget to give Mark Wahlburg (sp?) little to no action scenes...and something akin to a mix between Sharknado and Fast and Furious 12....a.k.a. kinda stupid. The car was nice looking. Way too much bullshit talking, and took forever to get the story moving...and the bad guy was un-believable so much so that he wanted to not reincarnate, but had a gun that could keep the others from reincarnating... lol.
Someone didn't pay attention in production apparently how bad this massive hole in the story was far too apparent to keep it in the final draft...ugh. It was BAD. Don't watch and certainly don't pay for it.
I'm not even sure if its at theaters, but if so, stay away.

I gotta get started on cutting out appliques...so Imma go now... might be back later, or tomorrow...
see how this whole week of shit blog post turns out....

________________
still day 3, but hours and hours later from wheneverthehell I wrote the above...

"I don't want to balance shit. I want raw wild chaotic freedom."

Sometimes I'm in utter love with the shit that I write.
Something I am passionate about is when surprises like that procure themselves onto the computer screen and I'm not even sure who lives inside me, but fuck yes, I love her.

This also scored me a chat with another coach that mingles with the movie/writing biz...
and I feel rather vibrationally aligned from such an encounter
He's one of my newest favorite people I find when I randomly accept/request friends on fb.

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Day 5.... I skipped day 4

I told someone to piss off today.
I was trying to be nice...but my glorious Scorpio Moon/Ascendant likes to show off
I love me

I'm here writing, even if I possibly have a few too many things I need to actually do
I still consider it a viable reason to be here, as this is important, even if I'm not saying anything...
I'm practicing typing... we'll go with that, because it's true.

Lots of plans...and I'm going to not overthink them too much, as that's when the momentum and inspiration falls off a cliff.
We'll do all the big stuff tomorrow...because right now, I ain't got a fucking clue what I'm doing
so...today, we are going to focus on that clarity and get a clear picture of what I want to manifest...
not even a thing, but I have to tackle a photoshoot (cause I'm cheap and a branding photoshoot is like $500.....and people are fucking drunk if they think I...as a photographer....am currently going to pay that....) (not that I wouldn't when I have a shit ton of income...but right now...I'm just starting out, and we are spending theoretical money on other things, haha)

I literately have a whole list of plans for today....and I'm trying to recall them without looking at my list...
Most of it's computer work...and some are held up due to others...and I really only have 3 things....
so..

Imma go do that....and Imma post this so I can start a new one ;)

A moment for the week.

There's this thing I'm giving up.
Not coffee...or anything serious...
but the whole idea that there needs to be a reconciliation with the body.

I get it though....that the other humans of the world want to reconcile with their spirit...
but I'm the backwards one...
I live somewhere out here in the aether lands....
    ....and I figured that I probably should have a real connection with the body
....there I go 'should'-ing on myself....
and that always leads to a road of shit...all without the giggles.
see....there's a mismatch....and I was gonna go do that vibration rising alchemy thing
   on my body, so it can catch the fuck up to me....
...
yet.... all it's doing ...this process of trying to do that...
is slowing me down...
and ain't nobody got time for that
least of all me

so... we're not gonna do it that way...
and revert back to the path of least resistance and rock this whole aether life like a boss

I'm good at that...even if I tend to lean more toward tyranny and dote a bit too much on my ego.
I'm good at that too.
I'm 'good' at that     ;)

see what I did there.

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.

Some high intuitive skills are still pointing out that there may be agents on my tail.
Not as in chasing, but keeping tabs... I'm not sure why, but I'm aware of their presence.
Things are weird.... not so much as to stand out, but subtle... little micro movements and details that are compiling at a tremendous rate.
weird.
they are all over facebook...
and I'm sure they are aware of this blog
and there's a dampened signal of late...
   interference...
so... I'm keen on making semi-bipartisan actions that will give them something to analyze
I haven't really done anything yet...but I will... sometime or another
maybe...

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soooo... 3 days later and still haven't gotten around to posting this
HA!
I have an interview today!
I have 15 baby quail chicks...and another 32 eggs in the incu.
No desire to do any projects.
It's gonna rain, so no swimming today. :(
The crypto world is shit right now and imma sit and here and not freak out about it.
Have a sewing order I could probably do later...I might send the invoice for it too, LOL.

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WOW! It's now the next day HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Day 4
This is like binge watching a series on Netflix with the whole series already done....and you don't have to wait for the last season
I have a job. I guess we'll call it that.
Still have quail.
I have desire to do projects all of a fucking sudden and I'm suspicious about it
the pool isn't warm enough, so maybe swimming tomorrow or the next day
The crypto world is great for buying! It will refurbish come late July <3, diamond hands, yo
   getting the youngest' account set up is taking forever...
Sewing order... I did send the invoice... and I may think about getting the fabrics set out and maybe cut them... maybe...
I have a goal at the moment.... doesn't mean it will stay, but it's here at the moment
  "I summon it forth."
or the whole... "So mote it be." whatever... "Amen."  

I'm in the mood for some Krispy Kreme doughtnuts
and I've got a plan for some of those projects...

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why do projects like to POP up, like right at the time I'm trying not to spend money...
like tf, yo...
I can buy paint, but do I want to.... NO
I probably need a canvas too....as I think I'm out... O_O
the atrocity!

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hmmm....

the deep stuff....where art thou?

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I started listing off things I'd like... and then after a whole 8 things or so, erased them.
More off, I don't want you to know what they are...like I'd have to defend my choices.
Pssh... how's that for some clearing ideas.
Why do people ask why?, or how? Do we have to go there... not one iota of any of those questions make an ounce of difference. If anything, it hinders it all.
That's like explaining. It may teach the other, inform them, help them understand, but what does it take from you? What really does it cost you to reverberate the past thoughts or actions that could justify the current standing or choice... ?? Like really?!
Is it so wrong to leave someone hanging, even in confusion, or perplexation, or lost...
even if they form ridiculous opinions or conclusions of you, or the thing....
does it matter?
even then, what is it going to cost you....if you decide to enter into that confusion and try to clear it up?
Why would you bother? It was their mess...let them find their own path out...
You though...keep fucking going. Keep moving forward.
And stop the explaining. The helping to understand. The pointing out all the facts you've found....
Keep moving forward....

The fire does not explain. It does not justify.
It just burns.
And it is respected.

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That was lame and boring...
not even deep....just a bunch of mind thoughts... all following the same pattern.
Lame.
Here's this explaining, LOL. Now stop it, LOL. I love my ego.

The aethers are just watching.
The Alchemist keeps watch... on them....
I'm suspecting there's this moment(s) of ascension on the horizon.
Not entirely sure it's for me. Probably for him, maybe?
I'll ask...what's going on...

"I said they were watching you." He says simply with an even tone. Still at ease, but more alert than his usual.
"What the hell for?" I've lost all connection to the nicities. "Wait....who are they?"
   I catch his words sharply. There are no others here.
He looks my way. But even the idea of 'my' way or 'that' way doesn't even exist.
"Another offshoot of me, huh?" I propose.
"It's a dividing." He says gently.
  A dividing... why does this sound beyond familiar, yet completely new. It seems I already know what it is and why and how and blah blah blah.
"What becomes after will no longer take hands with the fallen." He says it like it was written in some mystical text.
"Yay." I smile. Pleased to continue, regardless of whatever is bound to fall into my lap. It is familiar.
"You've always liked this part the best." He assures me.
"Yay." I go with it. Ain't nowhere else to be.  "So...what's gonna happen?"
"You want details? I thought you knew already." He snickers.
   I do.... but hearing it, writing it... makes it realer.
"It will be real enough." He nods. "More than you probably remember."
  It will be amazing.
"Watch." He instructs specifically. "The time between now and The Now...is only a shadow away."
 ....
"Yay." I snicker, with jazz hands, obviously.


_____________
So maybe I can get back to actually writing worth a shit afterwards. LOL Heaven knows it isn't today.
Or lately for that matter.
If it makes you feel any better.... Book 7 (am I on 7?) is still playing out over and over in my head.... so there's still that...

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Day 5
Two sewing orders! One needs done asap of course.
Ummm...I just got another new job... LOL!
I'm completely not bored... just extremely lucky!
Did go swimming too.
Made zucchini bread.
Watched a bunch of training videos on this other new job, lol.
actually doing that now...sooo....you see how under my pay grade this is.
   but there's sure to be other reasons...I just haven't figured them out yet....it was on a whim...
   just like my other new job... oh look...craiglist ad for this neat thing.. let's reply with everything but a resume HAHAHA!
Anyway....
   I have a list to get done

OOOoooohhh... and software update to run the 'new' 'programs'...
the theory for the vaccines...

I only say this because I updated my own system and had to reboot everything...
and maybe for one side, people can't..and it's saving people...
or people aren't following the programs...and they want to make sure they do...for the other side...
who's who....and which side do you play on?
I watch the game masters...
and don't play the game

I'm ecstatic today!
and need to stop writing for now...
will return in a few days maybe... who knows!

Later

Feel me up

 Took me awhile to find something annoying. HAHA!

Found this little gem on facebook...
*It’s very important for the next 24-48 hours that we concentrate on how we can serve the Universe above focusing on ourselves. This energy is needed right now in order to create a timeline that will help raise the frequency specifically for the next energetic update. The more the better*

Imma just dissect this intentionally all rude like.
Serve = Slave   in etymology....
The Universe is NOT separate from you. You don't just 'serve' the universe and stop serving yourself...
*facepalm emoji inserted here
YOU ARE THE WHOLE THING> THE WHOLE UNIVERSE... ALL YOU ALL THE TIME

and energetic updates don't come from some imaginary sun sign or planet or shuman resonance...
please... *slowly drags fingers down face
It comes from YOU bitches. CAUSE IT'S ALL YOU
Nothing is 'needed' either....
EVERYTHING IS ALREADY HERE AND NOW
EVERYTHING

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next_____________________



Do what you need to do to give yourself everything you want and deserve.
Many literately throw out huge store holds of joy and happiness because of (any excuse).
You get to be happy.
Step into that happiness.
That is where all your joy is. <3 
     ...even if it's just a _____...even if it's just _____.
It's you, it's all you. Love yourself.


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the other night I got interrupted by some weird download...
about meat suits, antennas, and static.
humans... antennas wrapped in insulation (the meat suits)
and filtering through space like static...
the tree of life is the grounding rod to solidify our connection to the forever electricity...

take what you want from that...all I know is that it wouldn't go away.
you're welcome

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"All those words aren't going to be able to teach you how to feel." - The Alchemist

He's talking about a video I'm listening to from this dude named Larry...
talking about money stuff
(anyway... )
there's been this specific thing we've been focusing on...
and there's this misalignment of matching signals happening...
something I was unaware of until my manifesting game goes to shit....
but I think now I know why it goes to shit sometimes....
it's because my energy of myself and my body are completely two different things...
...so there's this confusion of manifesting going on....
but it's nice to know I know why now...
HA!
We are spending time with that, yeah.

"Exactly." He relaxes, as I turn off the video, pleased it's quiet now.

Perhaps he is starting to appreciate these little writing sessions.

"I am." He affirms. "You listen better."

Maybe cause I hear better... now...
even in meditation lately, there's so much fucking noise.

"Gotta do it while you're awake and living....not in the dark." He adds. "You don't do much living in your sleep."

That was a lame sentence. Is he off his game?
I catch his scowl. He's offended I didn't like his words.
but he's right, even from the last time we chatted...about 'feeling with your eyes open'

"Of course, I'm right." He glares.

So what are we doing net? Or are we just focusing on this new practice?

"You just started. Like yesterday. Are you already looking ahead when you just got here?" He asks.

Of course I am.
And of course, I know skipping all the basics of something tends to bite me in the ass later.
I may get to level 5000 overnight, but I'll never beat it without knowing what happened at level 12....cause I skipped it... or maybe I will...it'll just take longer... and maybe I'll still be ahead....

He listens, but doesn't respond to my ramblings. I think he may share some of those strategies....and just will not ever admit it. Probably got him where he is today... assuming there actually were levels and whatnot.

"There may not be levels...but there certainly are perceptions." He adds almost quietly.

Who does he work for, I wonder... Is he an initiate of the Universe too?
He makes a slight grimace face. Almost looks as if I'm completely on the wrong path. He probably thought I was smarter. Now that I reread what I wrote...it sounds stupid... words are stupid.
He takes a deep breath....

"What do you think the Universe is?" He ever so frustratedly glances my way.

Do I have to answer that? I'm not in an answering mode, at all...
He waits, not peeling away.
Damn it...

The whole of all the things. I take the simple path.

"Close enough." He looks away. "How do you serve, that which you are?" He stresses those words....

So I can't even serve myself?

"Not like you think." He slowly shakes his head.

New thoughts trail through my mind...

"Yes." He adds, ever so quietly, letting me know I stepped onto the more legit track...

Nice. I'll take that.

"But don't go too far on that path." He quickly adds in. "It's only relevant when you see from a specific perception. Go too deep and you'll get lost."

Like a rabbit hole in the dark. I laugh at the analogy of going down a rabbit hole...
He smirks, unimpressed by my childish view of the whole universe.

Now what? Want me to go meditate and feel...or what?

"Go play your game. Enough thinking, enough words. Just feel." He kinda orders...

Just fill...
okay....

Little reminders on the page

 To
'feel with your eyes open'
to
'see with your soul'

to ground the thoughts into root
and wait until the fire is burning before taking actions
moving quick enough, sometimes blowing out the flame....
how big, how strong, does this flame need to be, yo?

when the spark burns...
why does it feel like an inferno?
do we just follow the sparks...
until we are lit eternally...internally?

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"Without the emotional charge...there's no power to produce the manifestation." -AH

and maybe that's where we all fall short
why we all fail at the numerous intentions and goals we so diligently set for ourselves
Sure, we meet some of them, and others, not so much.
Did we not care enough?
Not feel it enough?
Was it just an interlude of thoughts that tried to ignite the engine, but didn't have the fuel....
The electrical, but not the fuel...
That's the point where we tilt toward losing our grips on our desires...
Too much electrical, burning the wires, yet still unable to move forward in progress towards them
We don't feel enough
We don't FEEL enough....fill ... enough
Fizzling out, forgetting, losing track, falling away, distraction, and a forever resting place....
unable to get back up....out of gas, out of fuel... out of all the momentum.
Even if the thoughts are still lit... wondering why we aren't moving..
We sit.... and we wait... rusting

Follow the feelings.
I wrote this before in that little feng shui book...
and it still remains as relevant as before...
Follow the feelings...

~ Feeling isn’t only the compass, it is also the channel in which energy flows. ~

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___
yet, what am I doing?
forgetting that simple premise... because thoughts like to overwhelm sometimes.
sometimes



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.




I watched A Quiet Place 2.
It wasn't as good as the first one....
I'm still annoyed the dad died in the first one too...
and the subtitles were in french (and below the screen, so I couldn't see all of them anyway)
but it wasn't hard to follow...
It was okay, but I wouldn't pay to see it.

I might watch the new Conjuring next.

anyway...
eggs have like 6 more days in the incubator
nothing much happening
garden is growing
quail are happy
and I won about 2500 free bricks!
 

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He writes something on the corner of his notebook and rips it off the page...
sliding it ever so purposefully towards me.
His wry smile is chuck full of mischief and I can't see any way out of whatever nonsense I'm going to have to read.
He taps it slightly before lifting his hand off the torn piece and I catch the slight raise in smile before he leans back....but not all the way back into the chair...
He still leans a bit forward. I'm guessing he's expecting my approval, my acceptance... but has a slight edge of hesitation on my part he is ripe to engage with, if I so dare to tread upon any path of non-acceptance....
It's a trap. I know this... but there's something I love about his plans.
Even if I don't like them...not one single bit.
He flashes his eyes to the paper and back at me...an abrupt sense of him losing patience.
You'd think for an ascended master aether being... patience wouldn't be an issue...I ponder.
"Read it." He so gently instructs with the harshness of a bucket of ice water on Christmas day.
I smile and glance up at him, as I too enjoy the turmoil I get to impose on him the same way.
His energy floats strongly towards more seriousness and more impatience... I lean up to grab the small shredded piece of paper.... slowly...intentionally slowly...with a smile. He remains silent.
I stare at him as I grab it and bring it slowly towards me...settling in my seat more firmly...all in the great effort to prolong this whole interaction.
My eyes flicker down to the paper... it's torn edge, ripped at a very bad excuse for an angel...some lines from his notebook reveal themselves in the lower left area... blue lines... is he using a Top Flight notebook?
I inevitably look at his scribbles... they looks exactly like a doctor's prescription writing...and at first glance there's nothing that stands out that represents any such a word.... I start again... making out the letters... slowly.... he has either bad writing or...
"Words are primitive." He blurts out rather loudly. A slight scowl on his face.
Reading my thoughts again... as is the usual...
"They are loud." He snuffs out... "As usual..." He adds for accuracy.
I smile, with complete adoration of his huge sense of common courtesy...my kind of courtesy.
I start again trying to make out his half-assed effort to write words in some foreign cursive script from the dark ages.... I sigh...
I read it...and lower it down...unimpressed...
"Well?" He wants a response.
I sit quietly for a moment....
"Words are primitive." I agree, half-heartedly.
"Are you going to write all that?" He adds, knowing to fill a blog page with something of him, is always fun to read later...
I sink... there's far too much to write with words.... even if he only had a handful on his little corner of a page.
"It's still important." He adds quietly. "Even if you play the same games."
He's talking about ten things at once. And it won't matter to you whether I divulge all the things...
And there's the doorway....but it's not a doorway, so much as a bulge... like an area ready to pop open...like a cheap water hose left on, in the summer sun....and the blister on the side just can't hold it all in anymore...and you have to repair it again and again until your 100' hose is now only 40'....and it won't reach the garden...or the backside of the car...
"That was a lot of words...and you still didn't say anything." He calls out the obvious.
"What should I say then? The absolute....to where no one would really understand anyway?" I snicker.
"Yes." He says quietly. "Every time." He looks straight at me.
Damn it... why do I always do what he suggests... I can make my own decisions...
They just happen to be the same fucking ones...I'm not following his ideas...
"They are your ideas." He reminds me.
I shake my head not nearly believing that for a second.
"These are merely accessories to what you've already decided on. Like confirmations." He shrugs. "Whatever you'd like to call them. Doesn't matter....words are primitive." He smirks.
"Fine." I scowl.
"I'm not writing this crap." I toss the piece of paper back on the table. "Looks like a two year old wrote it."
He smiles. A real smile. He leans back in the chair.

The bulge...
-- We've only got so much time before there's a flood... make arrangements NOW.
but not like NOW as in seriousness or abruptness...but now as in no more time for distractions/games.
-- The stuff in the bird room needs organized. The feng shui in weighing in too heavy. Must align.
-- all the little things and little cleanings need attention before they become too large.
-- once the bulge pops open... everything needs cleared beforehand so it doesn't compact and clog the flow. Handle it now. Handle it now.
-- I don't know how long of a timeframe this means... but it's strictly forefront in my awareness now... all thanks to a little note handwritten by The Alchemist..in some relic of a handwriting style...


anyway...it's late.
tomorrow rises with the sun.