I can feel his approach like fire...in my blood.

I give up.
So there's a division. Partly an existence of living along the flowing river and joyfully taking what comes as grace. Partly being patient and sincere and calm. Partly seeing fullness in what things may come as well as smiling unto the next sunrise.
The other side gets trapped beneath that wholesome illusion. Where it cries and wails for it all to be over. Screaming to go home. Cringing that whatever this life holds that it cannot actually be a part of it....not ever. Only watch it from afar.
I'm tired. angry. lonely. diving into sadness. Let me fall. I want to.

Things are falling apart. And I'm too tired to pick up the pieces or even care to put them back together. Why should I have to. Scrambling to save the wholesome little worlds we call life. Why.
No more. I give up and will watch it fall. Falling. falling.
Bitterness bites. Deep fangs searching for blood. Drink mine. It's all gone cold, bled out over and over and over again. Rigid heartbeats struggling to find something to warm its breath.
Stoned as a statue. Unmoving and silent. This is what will come if the fire goes out.
The fire. The ever burning fire that moves as in a cloud and encircles the throne room. Colors swirling..warmth. Depth of everlasting within the nucleus. And the only one who cares standing beside me.
What was the judgement of that day? Guilty maybe. Or was I even seen at all. Forgotten like I often forget.

So the fall comes...just after the dance. And we fall.
And then...the rise.
Burning blazing radiant consuming fire. Both of us. Devouring fire...ever burning...with everlasting depths...colors swirling....and you then...will fall.


Yeah, I know you don't 'get' it. It doesn't matter anyway, I'm not trying to open your eyes anymore.

It's been a long time since I came around.
Been a long time, but I'm back in town.
This time I'm not leaving without you.