I took the stars from my eyes and then I made a map....And knew that somehow I could find my way back.
Then I heard your heartbeating, you were in the darkness too......So I stayed in the darkness with you.
The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out.....You left me in the dark.
No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight.....In the shadow of your heart.
The other morning.... a gift came to my door. Mind you it was rather early...early to me...and I was in fact in bed. So the doorbell rang, and my body immediately responded....jumping into action like 'oh, doorbell!' and my mind was like 'aaaahhhhhhh someone's going to die!'...and grumbling I got up to answer the door.
A black man...with glasses hands me a flyer thing....and says he's from so and so church and they are having some special Easter service thing-a-ma-jig...the messenger isn't the point....so long as you got the message. So I got this flyer, yeah, whatever, said thank you all nice like, cause he was nice and he did apologize in case he woke me up....close door, walk into kitchen...happen to read said flyer...well, close it back (it was folded like a card) and on the front...there it is...the gift.
And just for some pretense...I'm rather blunt with the boss man...and sometimes I feel like I scare him away, and he doesn't much pay attention to little ol me and my immature antics cause I'm still learning and I'm hard headed. And I'm impatient....though I try not to be...but I really can't help it. Once you've had a piece of heaven it is really freaking hard to pretend like you can wait to get another piece. Well...anyway....there's this journey I'm working on and I've been waiting for this particular item for quite some time now. Might not seem like a long time in the path to eternity and all...but I had almost either forgotten about it, or thought it was just another 'thought' that wouldn't come to pass in reality.
Well....I got it that morning...and once I read it, there was that odd silence in your head where you feel that tinge of epiphany and coincidence and can't do anything to hold that creeping smile from invading your lips. Ooooh, yes, that feeling like you really aren't living in your head, because you are holding it in the flesh, in your hand, and again you remember what really matters and what's really real, even if you're the only one that thinks so.
"You Are Invited" and that was all I needed.
I'm trying not to consider that the date on it was for the 14th. (Monday) cause that just happens to be the day before that other day.... which you could educated yourself about if you watched youtube videos and such...not that all those are true, but entertaining nonetheless.
I'm rather happy because of this said occurrence, and there's probably a few more thing-a-ma-jigs I've been awaiting, but sometimes I have really cool days.
In other news....work is totally sucking. I'm far behind and I go into these internal debates of whether or not my mental well being is at stake and whether it really is important whether or not I do a certain task now or later. Either way I win.... I'm not sure what I'm debating. Things get done eventually. Bummed that there's just a lot of things. Vacation coming up soon. So I keep telling myself anyway.
There's been a very odd vibration happening lately and I don't think I like it. Unsettling it is. Not the bad feeling stuff, but the unsettling kind...the kind that means occurrences in life similar to earthquakes, eruptions, and thunderstorms on a worldly scale.... like in your life, not on earth...unless you consider yourself earth..... ... yeah, I'm confusaling you. sorry.
Looks like we'll be in for a very turbulent ride for a bit. And this will be okay. Should be fun.
Like 'stopping by a music store and spending 300 dollars just because' kinda of fun. Or buying a part for something only to realize you need the more expensive part instead...just after you go to that music store kind of fun. Or having a kitten sniff your armpit like it is catnip and laugh because its funny and then he bites you there too kind of fun. ...oh there's so many more types of fun out there. I'm excited. Not because I like the frustration....but I do like the challenge. And you can't get to the boss man at the end of the game unless you complete each level. Of course, this particular boss man doesn't need defeated.....you do. It is ourselves we need to conquer. Our own frustrations, our own fears, doubts, illusions....and lies. Conquering ourselves in order to remember what we really are. And this is why thunderstorms are exciting, and why earthquakes are amazing, and eruptions are spectacular displays. Because we are such displays, we are these things....and what is a starry sky without a comet, or a song without vibration, or color without light. Let us be joyous in our trials.
Ugh, sorry, didn't mean to sound all blah blah fancy talkish. Too poetic I suppose. Anyway, watch for your invitation, make sure it's signed, and I'll see you at the banquet, I'll be by the fruit...or wherever the boss man is.
Later tators of green pickled strawberry patched kids., going to bed, and tomorrow I'm going to sew and play with this new thing we got from the music store.
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