Things that don't make sense matter

 It's Halloween night....

and I sent out a bunch of emails yesterday for my screenplays.and I'm not one bit happy about it...
and I'm trying to convince myself that I had to do it to discover the answers...
but in truth.
I already knew the answer,
I always know the answer, *sigh.
and I keep trying to disprove myself all the time...
cause who can be right all the time?
who?
who?
even when I pretend it's gonna go great...
or have hope.
or have some illusion playing in my mind about the possibilities...
there's something standing right there in front of my mind going...
  'nah girl. this is bullshit.'
and I tell her to shut up, cause how does she know.
how does this I know?
how?
how?
who is she?
who is me?

fuck.

_______________

so what now...
what now?

mundane life stuff... all bullshit
writings stuffs....
   book editing starts tomorrow <3
  other book is still in progress cause it comes when it comes and I can't tell you when it supposed to come or not.
  Nothing else yet, beside a few random posts on FFS group... which I'm planning to transition over to my main page...and maybe restart a public page afterwards...

Art is revealing colors to me, so that will be on the agenda soon.
Excited to get back into the colors and paints and creating
Probably just christmas presents, cause I'm only buying a new bed mattress this year...and maybe a new go cart...and if I miraculously win  a million dollars     enough...  a porsche. 

Yeah, so... idk...
aethers are quite a thing lately, so I've been there
and I'm on a mission to hit 500 workouts on my ifit before the end of the year...
think it's at 437 right now... since December last year when I got my Nordictrack

Yes, I'm still working at my little side gig job.

All good here.
I love my life.

Just another day in the New Kingdom

 ooohhh...

So let's just say there's an ongoing creation going on with the perceived past.
A huge memory/past dump and wipe out...
Yeah... past-hacking...
of which I have doted on the things I've already altered.
and now it's been ravaged by an eraser and defrag and clearing...
so much so that it's been removed.
Every fucking bit of it this time.
Not sorry.

And now there's the adding of that which I've called forth to include in the rebuilding.
Something we can't do in a day...
but oh my dear...
   the effects of just this morning's new layer....
      can already be felt.

I might call this absurd and insane...
and maybe a bit hypnotic and erroneous and careless and dangerous....
    if I were someone looking in....
but to me...this is a necessary freeing of all that I am.
   and what was carved out from me....
    what was covered and stolen and cut away and hidden...
can now only thrive.
Like a forest that regrows after you've torn down the factory.

God bless this time and space for this healing and rewriting and creating.
   the matrix the council has placed me in is dead...
and I'm the fucking forest bitches.

_________________________

Mundane shit...

I'm getting antsy about editing book 7!!
  so excited to get back to it and start the process....
  but it's not time yet...
   Ahhhh! I can't wait!!

but anyway...
trying to remember to come here and write shit, cause I forget...
and obviously I can't always write on my feng shui group...
I can't always post awesome content for people to argue over on my page...
and I can't always write the 'currently in progress' book...
and I can't always write or edit my novels....
and maybe if I had a brain cell I didn't delete...
   I'd remember I have scripts to work on.... or write...

yeah.... so Imma do that...
one of those at least, LOL

have a great day

Futures of the new..it's CORN!

 It's only been a handful or two...of months...
"I'm totally alive and well!"
...
mundane ---
   I quit sewing at home, I laid aside ShadowDragon Dreams... yet again.
   I still have the job.
   Still have the quail, the kids, the pets, the numerous household projects I've yet to get done.
  I recently finished the first draft of book 7
   Still working on the other book.
   Still have plans/ideas for my feng shui group workbook thing... maybe...it's shifting.
  Still workout almost every day of the week.
   I have a bushel of apples in my kitchen.
   Finally regrouted my bathroom tile.
  I pet sit still, but only recurring clients, not taking any new ones right now.
   Have a ton of yard stuff to do...pool stuff...
 
___________

The Alchemist is still here and I love that.
  this makes like 3 years, yo! I'm SO ECSTATIC!

I think I'll actually go write a few pages in this other book I'm working on..
It;s a process since it's not a story...
It's about ME and The Alchemist... and omg, I love it so fucking much.

__________

Future post... cause I have it on my to-do list and why not.

A chunk of weeks until the revealing.
The theater is ready, the backdrops are set....
and now the actors are practicing their lines.
The lighting crews and the prop directors are awaiting their time to shine.
Just a handful more weeks and this show will be a GO!

You'll start to feel the settling in by November as people take their seats.
They'll be anticipating the new stories, the new writers, the new characters...
They'll get comfortable and cozy and sigh with relief...
and then the curtains will open to reveal THIS WHOLE NEW THING!
This new thing you never saw coming.
No one leaked info, or spoke a word of it...yet here it is..laid bare before our eyes.
   The new program and the new system...
Then the scene will open...the story set...and hence forth the integration will commence.

You won't have to ask for what you need...
It will be served.
You won't have to struggle to make ends meet...
The new systems will be user friendly, although a slight learning curve (or a set back to some for a very short time)
But overall, things will run smoother and faster once you get the hang of it.
Lapse time will be shortened dramatically, so don't be surprised if things go from thought to reality fairly quickly.
Remain seated and play along with the characters...
    they will be there to entrain you to navigate and utilize the new structures, programs, and systems.

Take note: There will be multiple sides of the theater.
Think of it like a symphony or orchestra. Some people will be the base drums, others the trumpets, still others the violins and flutes and cellos and oboes...
recognize and be kind to those who are opposite your playing field.
We all work in accordance with the tools and knowledge we've accumulated thus far.

The rest of us in the balcony seats who don't participate will be watching the show and the audience and throwing little tips to help you enjoy the disaster adventure you have found yourself in.
We have popcorn up here.