Wednesday, December 30, 2020

Star seeds, but not like that

Allow yourself the shit you want.
Yes. The trips. The vacations.
The vacuumers, the gopro, the cars, the trucks, the food.
The 4runner, the waterbottles, the watercolor markers...
The books, the flowers, the pool.
The relationship, the kids, the friends, the career.
The wealth, the freedom, the wisdom, the flexibility.
The grace, the patience, the clarity.
ALL the things. Anything....everything.

Buy them, save for them, budget for them, create them, borrow them.
Whatever it is.
Allow yourself to have them. Experience them. Be them.

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So I'm working on book 7 in my head, right...
and it's kinda got this theme of asking for support...
but, we all know dragons like to do things themselves....
it's easier that way...
cause other people barely understand themselves, much less you.

and waiting for them to initiate some cool life shaking fun exciting expenditure....
doesn't seem to happen.... ever...
unless you prod them long enough to get them to fall off the ledge...
and that's not very nice...
     (*stands there holding poker stick with a devious smile)

neither is leaping and watching them fumble to try and catch you...
but at least you get to take the leap

but what is life without the joy of chaos
what good is the good without the devil playing banjo in your head
What purpose is there if you only walk in the light, or only the dark, or only the shade.
I tend to like them all.
I might be the villain in most stories...
only to inadvertently be the hero by default.

But we gotta just claim the kingdom...
Maybe you can work your way up to the top...
Maybe you can patience yourself long enough so you die before reaching your goals.
... and maybe you don't have to.
You just keep choosing to.

Choose different
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Body is still waiting to see if we're gonna let her do the thing.... which we are, but Mind and Brain are lagging on the initiation.

Mind is consumed on an art piece idea and what it needs to bring it all together.... She's getting mad that we keep trying to use her for other projects.

Brain is fascinated at the gopro and the reasons why we didn't purchase one sooner...and is analyzing that whole scenario to be able to avoid any and all delays at all costs next time.... but also is aware that it wouldn't have felt the same had it not had the momentum and clarity like it currently does.

The Kid is painting stars on the train. She doesn't give a rip about what the rest of us are doing. The Alchemist is helping her... ( O_O ...he has paint on his uniform... O_O ... I don't think he knows yet)

The Overseer is still just watching. Being suspiciously quiet.

Ego is doting all over herself today, if you couldn't already tell from all the "I" 's up above. She deserves it though....she was the one who brought the whole gopro and vacuumer and all the other things to our attention....and in turn they have all been hugely beneficial.
This is why we keep saying to love your ego and trust her. She knows her shit.
*Ego nods at our acknowledgement.

Soul is looking forward to see if traveling will be a possibility next fall...(cause Ego keeps shoving this obvious adventure in all our faces). and if the thing that shall not be named is gonna be still a thing for the public... and Soul mentioned a few things this morning which the Overseer was horrified at...but that's her job... so... they are in some mental convo about it. Pretty sure I'm fucked, everyone eventually agrees with Soul.

____ ___
and who am I in this mess of perspective anomalies?... good fucking question...the witness perhaps?
I usually jump into Soul a lot... but she's being too love and light lately...and I don't like it, lol.
Maybe my shadow self or something. Who knows, but I feel like home here.
   (*all the villains raise your hands up!)

I really shouldn't divulge myself into all these aspects....
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
but alas... I don't 'should' (or 'shouldn't') on myself.

so long as we all are still on the same train <3


Fantasy creature stars and shadows | Dark fantasy art, Dark fantasy, Fantasy  art.


___________

Today is planning day!
Not as in setting a schedule or goal list or anything stupid like that...
but basically clarity for focus and manifesting...
The Alchemist says this train goes wherever you want it to...
and since we are the pit stop at the moment...
He's trying to get me to choose some sort of destination...
not that we'll ever reach it in particular...but we'll learn a whole hell of a lot on the way.
And he knows that. And I know that.
And as I walk over to the train track board....
it's this jumbled mess of dashed lines....and we are at some hub that connects to a ton of other stuff...
I have no idea what I'm even looking for.... ugh.
Which is exactly why it is planning day.

I'll let you know what bullshit thing I decide on...
and how often we end up going on side quests!
And all the stuff we get to learn on the way! Yay!


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I asked him for a quote....cause I like to come back and read the stuff he says...
he glances over at me from the side of the train where the kid is painting.

"Tell them not to expect much wiggle room from you."

"What does that mean?" I ask in return.

"You wrote 'flexibility' earlier, yes? Might want to retract that comment. Trains don't wiggle. They stay on course... and so will we."

... he says it so serious like... ew.

"No side quests?" I snicker.

He doesn't reply...
shit...
a sudden fear of having no relaxation or procrastination wells up...

"What is procrastination?" The Alchemist picks up on my thought.

"Postponing stuff." I mention.
he glares my way... I quickly go to look it up in etymology...
"Belonging to tomorrow...." I comply accurately.

"And where are we?" He adds on, cause he's a boss at eradicating shitty vibes.

"Now. Today. Here." I answer.

"Good." He nods, glancing back to the stars on the train.
 
He still doesn't notice the streak of paint on his sleeve.

"It's a good place to be." He adds.

He's watching the Kid paint, completely enveloped and at one with her task.
There's nothing but the 'now' for her. Always 'now'.

"Go plan." He yanks me out of thought. "Thoughts are for later."

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thoughts are always for later... or for before......
It's all peace and stillness in the now... but the action is the effect of that stillness...
like some universal law of correspondence and cause and effect.
I get it.
I get it.










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